As a first post I’d like to start off with the mission of Men’s Therapy.

It is to cultivate authenticity in the lives of men.

Sounds simple. Of course what may be simple may not necessarily be easy. There are those rare individuals for whom living authentically comes without effort (think Seinfeld’s Kramer). For the rest of us, the constant donning and replacing of various masks and hats befitting all our roles throughout the week causes stress, anxiety, fear, depression and desperation (to name a few of the heavy hitters).

Wouldn’t it be so nice to just be you and act how you really want to act, to say what you want to say? We all have this fantasy from time to time, but the fact that we live in a practical day-to-day reality, filled with responsibility limits our ability and degree to do and say as we wish. And, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Being able to plan and orient toward the future and not act recklessly or without caution, can and does lead to greater good. It’s a balancing act. And this is the point – we make choices. Where problems enter is when we feel we have no choice or the choices made have led to undesirable situations. Or more fundamentally, we do not understand why or how we make some of these choices.

Current situations cannot be re-done, but their consequences may be changed. At the very least they can be understood so as to make better choices in the future. The deepest change occurs in relation to understanding. And understanding itself is the real point. The past cannot be undone, but it can be understood. All this self-understanding then relates to who you are, currently, as an individual acting about in the world with all of your motivations, wants and desires, successes, failures and strengths and weaknesses. There may be competing or conflicting ideas, ideas that overpower other ideas and ideas that have been suppressed or forgotten or abandoned, Ut which may wreak havoc in your current life.

What is strived for is a balanced choice – one chosen and supported by as much self-awareness as possible. A balance point of choice rather than one to which you have just accustomed yourself. So take a moment, stop, think about your life. Think about what could be more satisfying. And the next obvious step? How to make it so.