It’s time to get back to more thoughtful posting—perhaps..ok…well just posting in general as I look back on the last post date. And perhaps something relevant to get back on track, perhaps even something positive and uplifting.
The concept of abundance vs. scarcity has been around for a while. Basically, it’s a distinction in mental states from which we operate. In a scarcity mindset, fear is a primary motivator.
Thoughts often stem from “I don’t have enough” or “I need to protect what I do have.”
Obviously, this can be a problematic way to operate in the world. Sure, there are situations that call for caution and prudence—that’s not what we’re talking about here. This is about individuals who don’t venture out to gain. We’ll never have 100 percent certainty in our actions, but that’s also not the point. The scarcity mindset prevents one from living a full, enjoyable life. Relating to the world this way means always being on the lookout for the next shoe to drop or the next catastrophe to occur.
True scarcity, in effect, immobilizes and keeps us stuck in our current situation—which, most likely, will continue to degrade rather than maintain (remember the second law of thermodynamics).
The abundance mindset is often touted as the better option. This involves operating from a mindset of “having enough” or “being enough”—a genuine confidence of sorts. Yes, as a general mindset, it’s probably better. But, like anything, too much of it can be a bad thing. Overestimating your capacity or ability can be troublesome, so there needs to be a vigilance in relating properly to the world (self-determined) for those times when you may be overreaching.
With the background out of the way…on to the practical…
All this talk of shifting from scarcity to abundance sounds great. But how do I do it? Isn’t that always the question? For more, see the posts on “What” and “How.”
As in a lot of therapy, this comes down to our own narrative. What do we tell ourselves?
If you’re like me and often operate from a scarcity mindset, the phrase “yeah, but” will resonate. When considering something “good” that has happened or may happen, this little phrase often jumps in for the ride. Had a good month professionally? “Yeah, but that was last month.” Or, “Yeah, but that was a fluke.” Looking forward to an upcoming event? “Yeah, but I’ll probably end up sick beforehand.”
The problem is that there are countless ways in which the “but” can manifest. And typically, there’s only one way for something to go well—and that path is just too narrow to count on.
One thing that may help is introducing the phrase “Yes, and.” I first heard of this from a client who was doing improv. He explained that an improv actor must always come from a state of mind of “yes, and…” in order to keep the scene going. If there’s a “yeah, but,” the scene stops; there’s no continuance.
I like this—a lot.
There’s quite a bit packed into the simple phrase “yes, and.” Initially, there’s acceptance.
For the improv actor, whatever has been presented as the situation must first be accepted. This is not unlike reality: when presented with a situation, we must accept it first. If we deny it, things grind to a halt, and we make no progress—we’re too caught up in why it “shouldn’t” be this way. This often shows up in the self-narrative as “If only it weren’t this way” or “I wish this didn’t happen.” Neither phrase is helpful for moving forward. Acceptance is needed first.
Secondly, there’s the crucial difference between “yes, and” and “yeah, but”: the “and.” The “and” allows for forward movement by creating options. Even if what follows the “and” is ridiculous, at least it’s an option. Using “and” forces something to come to mind, and the more options there are, the more possibilities you have.
The simplicity and practicality of this subtle narrative shift can be powerful. It’s often really hard to convince yourself to shift from scarcity to abundance conceptually. Again, there are countless reasons for stopping and only a limited set—or one reason—to keep going. As an aside, I think this might be due to the constraints of reality. We can easily fantasize about the most absurdly negative outcomes, but when considering how things may go well, we’re limited to reality.
So maybe we need that shift in language to create change—and to accept reality.